Manhattan Center for Cognitive Behavioral Therapy

Schedule an appointment
  • Home
  • Teletherapy
  • Affiliated Therapists
  • Problems Treated
    • Anxiety
    • Panic Attacks
    • Insomnia
    • Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)
    • Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD)
      • POCD: Pedophilic OCD
      • HOCD – “Gay OCD”
      • Harm OCD
      • Hit and Run OCD
      • Existential OCD
    • Depression
    • Social Anxiety
    • Trichotillomania
    • Dermatillomania (Skin Picking)
  • Resources
    • What is CBT?
    • How to Get Started with CBT
    • What Is Mindfulness?
    • Free PTSD evaluations for frontline medical workers
    • Worksheets
    • Links
  • Training
    • The MCCBT externship
    • The MCCBT Postdoctoral Fellowship
  • Blog
  • Contact us
Home » Blog » Addiction » The Set Aside Prayer

The Set Aside Prayer

October 19, 2020 by Dr. Paul Greene

God, today help me set aside everything I think I know about You, everything I think I know about myself, everything I think I know about others, and everything I think I know about my own recovery so I may have an open mind and a new experience with all these things. Please help me see the truth.

The set aside prayer is used at the start of many twelve-step group meetings for those in recovery from addiction. The groups help those who have struggled with food, alcohol, drugs, gambling, and other dependencies.

The set aside prayer is a powerful aid for many people. There is a lot of wisdom in it — even more than first appears! This article will examine some of the prayer’s most important aspects that make it helpful for so many.

Mindfulness

Mindfulness is a name for the type of awareness we have when we are in the present moment, observing our experience in a simple and nonjudgmental way. It’s widely thought to be helpful in our efforts to manage a variety of issues including anxiety, stress, and urges toward addictive behavior.

Practicing mindfulness helps us cultivate something called beginner’s mind.

Beginner’s Mind

Adults are often charmed and captivated when they watch a child enjoy something for the first time — whether it’s eating cotton candy, playing with a puppy, or playing a new game — because the experience is so new and fascinating for the child. In the Zen tradition, a child’s mindset in these situations is called “beginner’s mind.” It refers to having an attitude of openness, eagerness, and lack of preconceptions, just as a child or a beginner would.

Why does Zen concern itself with childlike states of mind? Because that freshness of perspective is something valuable. If we are able to set aside our preconceptions about something and experience it as if for the first time, this is beginner’s mind. It’s a perspective that prayer and meditation can help us practice.

The set aside prayer very directly and helpfully points us toward this mindset.

Humility

The set aside prayer helps us practice humility in two important ways.

It reminds us that we’re not perfect. What we think we know might be wrong. It might be right, of course, but setting aside certainty for a while can help us to remain open.

set aside prayer - humility quote

We practice asking for help from something bigger than ourselves because it’s helpful to admit to ourselves the limits of our abilities to navigate recovery. The object of this prayer is often referred to as a higher power, and this higher power can be whatever is most meaningful for you.

The ability to ask for help is important for all of us — whether we’re in recovery or not. The set aside prayer helps us practice that in a small way.

Letting Go

Somewhere between humility and mindfulness is letting go.

Letting go is an important skill; it leads us closer to accepting the things we can’t control. How does it do this? By helping us achieve serenity.

In the serenity prayer, we pray for the serenity to accept the things we can’t change. We can achieve that serenity more quickly and reliably by practicing our ability to let go. When we let go of our attachment to something, there is a kind of peace that replaces it. The more we practice letting go, the more serenity we are likely to have.

Openness

In the set aside prayer, we pray for an open mind. Why?

We all have ways of thinking we know what’s best. And sometimes we do. However, if we’re not careful, this confidence in our own ideas can become a kind of inaccurate arrogance. And arrogance doesn’t help recovery. Sometimes the best antidote to arrogance is an open mind.

To sum things up: the set aside prayer is helpful in many ways. It reminds us of the value of humility, the value of a fresh perspective, and the value of letting go. This shift in mindset can put us in a better place to continue our recovery.

Related posts from manhattanCBT.com:

Filed Under: Addiction, Mindfulness and meditation Tagged With: Mindfulness, recovery

Manhattan Center for CBT

Search

Key resources

  • Anxiety: Everything you need to know
  • Mindfulness -- A beginner's guide
  • A comprehensive guide to PTSD
  • How to Find a Therapist
  • OCD Overview
  • Insomnia resource page
  • Panic Attacks -- Get informed
  • Social Anxiety guide
  • Trichotillomania information
  • Depression -- Ultimate guide
  • Stay up to date with ManhattanCBT

    Enter your email to subscribe and receive new posts via email.

    Categories

    • Addiction
    • American mental healthcare
    • Anxiety
    • Cancer
    • Career
    • Cognitive-behavioral therapy
    • Coronavirus
    • DBT
    • Depression
    • Eating disorders
    • Evidence-based treatment
    • Featured
    • Insomnia
    • Kids and teens
    • Mindfulness and meditation
    • OCD
    • Panic attacks
    • PTSD
    • Social Anxiety

    Affiliated Therapist Writings

    • Amoha Bajaj-Mahajan, Ph.D.
      • Shy and Dating? Helpful Tips from a Psychologist
      • How to Understand and Overcome Your Anxiety at Work
    • Anna Womack, Ph.D.
      • Self-Care Tips for the Coronavirus Outbreak
      • Unhappy at Work? 3 Options for Job Satisfaction
    • Carly Geller, Psy.D.
      • Cognitive Distortions and What to Do About Them
      • Why You Have Intense Emotions, and How to Cope
    • Rachel Chang, Psy.D.
      • How to Be Awesome at Self-Soothing and Self-Care
      • Accepting Things As They Are: Why and How to Do It
    • Jennifer Chen, Psy.D.
      • Mindfulness of Emotions: How Can It Help You?
      • How to Survive Holiday Stress
    • Justin Arocho, Ph.D.
      • What Is Panic Disorder With and Without Agoraphobia?
      • How to Deal With the Torment of Relationship Obsessions
    • Kristen Piering, Psy.D.
      • Coronavirus: Tips for Parents During Social Distancing
      • “Will I Get Sick Too?” — Talking to Your Children and Teens about Coronavirus
    • Melissa Aiello, Ph.D.
      • Why Do I Hate My Job?
      • How to Overcome the Vicious Cycle of Depression and Avoidance
    • Dr. Paul Greene
      • Is PTSD Permanent? It Doesn’t Have To Be
      • Integrative Therapies: Are They Good Psychotherapy Options?

    Contact Information

    Manhattan Center for
    Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy
    276 Fifth Avenue, Suite #905
    New York, NY 10001 (map)
    1-646-863-4225
    https://manhattancbt.com

    Copyright © 2020 Manhattan Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy/Psychology, PLLC, d.b.a. the Manhattan Center for Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy & Paul B. Greene, Ph.D. except where otherwise noted.

    Connect With Us

    • Email
    • Facebook
    • Phone
    • RSS
    • Twitter

    Recent Tweets

    Tweets by @anxietyocd

    Recent Posts

    • What Is Panic Disorder With and Without Agoraphobia?
    • Is PTSD Permanent? It Doesn’t Have To Be
    • Integrative Therapies: Are They Good Psychotherapy Options?
    • Avoidance: There’s No Escaping Its Importance to Anxiety
    • How to Handle a Fear of Driving
    • OCD and Depression: How Are They Connected?
    • OCD
    • Anxiety
    • Depression
    • Social Anxiety
    • Insomnia
    • Trichotillomania
    • Mindfulness
    • Panic Attacks